the only valid naruto meta is the single use clothing sasuke theory my flatmates came up with after a drunken binge of the chuunin exams
“Single Use Clothing Sasuke” is a complex, multi-layered theory borne of the complex, multi-layered minds of my flatmates. It essentially boils down to the idea that Every Single Thing sasuke wears from the day of the uchiha massacre to the day he leaves the village are entirely different yet identical versions of the same two outfits. He only wears them once and then throws them out.
The idea behind this is based on the implications that a) sasuke lives alone in the uchiha compound which is intended to be lived in by hundreds of people, b) he was not cared or provided for in any way by the village adults after the massacre, and c) there are entire city blocks of empty uchiha houses full of free shit just sitting there, ESPECIALLY clothing.
Theory is as follows: sasuke, clearly unable to do his own laundry because he’s 12 and a moron, spends four years of his life using the abandoned clothes that previously belonged to the children in the uchiha clan as disposable clothing and there’s a landfill in Konoha somewhere just full of black playsuits.
Companion theory “One-Shirt Uzumaki” where naruto owns exactly one (1) set of clothing that he furiously hand washes every night at 1am.
you know what this is pretty plausible actually all things considered
What I love most about this is that this person was SO INCENSED at the recipient that they couldn’t even wait the days/weeks it would take for the mail to go through. No, they had to say “FUCK YOU” as soon as fucking possible and, AND, let the recipient that they were not done with the fuck you, nay, this was merely the first volley in what would undoubtably be a dressing down of Biblical proportions.
i will gleefully reblog this every time i see it
My #brand
Telegrams were pricey too. They paid a lot to say fuck you as soon as possible
The practice started in the late 1990s, when somebody decided to leave a lipstick kiss on the tomb. Since then lipstick kisses and hearts have been joined by a rash of red graffiti containing expressions of love, such as: “Wilde child we remember you”, “Keep looking at the stars” and “Real beauty ends where intellect begins”. Kissing Oscar’s tomb on the Paris tourist circuit has become a cult pastime.
A fine of €9,000 ($12,000) was imposed on anyone caught kissing or damaging the historical monument, but it had no effect. It was hard to catch people in the act, and most culprits were tourists who were long gone before the police could bring them to court. Appeals from Wilde’s grandson Merlin Holland to stop the practice also fell on deaf ears. A plaque asking fans to respect the tomb instead of defacing it went in vain.
Meanwhile, those greasy red lipstick stains seeped into the stone making it harder and harder to clean. Every cleaning eroded a layer of stone rendering it even more porous, so the next cleaning had to go even deeper and wear away the stone even more.
I have no idea why anyone would believe Oscar Wilde isn’t delighted by this.
It’s beautiful and illegal. Oscar Wilde would most certainly be delighted by such lovely vandalism.
Oscar Wilde has more legal protection when he’s dead than when he was alive.
I’ve spent some time wondering at Dumbeldore’s rational for hiring Gilderoy Lockhart and I’ve reached the following conclusion.
When Dumbledore met Lockhart, all he thought was “Oh, this is going to be hilarious.”
I always got the vibe that Dumbledore was like, “there is no possible way for this man to be a Death Eater,” and hired him on the spot.
I like the idea of Dumbledore overcorrecting all the time.
First professor was a death eater? Lets get one who definitely isn’t. That one was an egoistical jerkface? I’ll hire literally the most humble and unassuming human on Earth. Lupin got kicked out by a bunch of parents? Lets go for a man who is incapable of taking any shit from anyone…. etc.
okay but that’s actually a really insightful analysis
SliceOSunshine 